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Quotes and Sayings - Colloquialisms Part 3

By: Lisa Jay, Fri Dec 9th, 2005 09:43:49 PM

Not very nice but colloquialisms just the same. (just fill in the blank with a word of your choice)

"you annoy me like a wet leaf stuck to my __" "they don't put foundations under s___ houses" "I'd rather board you than feed you, even if you sh__ the bed!" "he's like a one-legged man in an a__ -kicking contest".  "oh, go sh__ in your hat" - only say this to a grump! "want in one hand, sh__ in the other, and see which one gets full first." "remember, (name), don't eat any yellow show" "it's time to make like a princess and pee" "you can't pee up my back and tell me its rain!" "like a fart on a hot griddle" "I'm busier than a cat covering cr__." "queer as a three dollar bill." "colder than a well digger's a__" "so full of sh__ his eyes are brown" "doesn't know his a__ from a hole in the ground" "couldn't pour p__s out of a boot if the instructions were written on the heel." "when I was hard I was soft and when I was soft I was hard." "colder than a witch's t__ in a brass bra" "slipperier than a witch's t__" "two ax handles wide across the a__" - large behind "two ax handles and a rain barrel" - really large behind "a horse that sh__ fast don't sh__ long." "fell a__ over tin cup" "go p__ up a rope." "scared sh__less" "tighter than a bull's a__ in fly time" "not worth a patch on his mother’s a__" "cold enough to freeze the balls off a brass monkey" "faster than a striped-a__ jaybird" "a__hole deep to a ten foot indian" "wouldn't say sh__ if he had a mouthful" "didn’t know whether to sh__ or go blind" "so drunk he couldn't find his a__ with both hands" "never cut a fat hog in the a__ with a dull knife" "face as red as a jaybird's a__ in pokeberry time" "not tough enough to kick the sh__ out of your own pants" "so weak you couldn't knock a sick wh___ off a sh__ pot" "food tasted so bad the dog had to lick his a__ to take the taste out of his mouth" "a__ as big as a $40 cow" "mouth as dry as popcorn fart" "hotter than a cut mink" (spayed) "didn't know whether to sh__ or wind his watch" "not worth the scrapings off a hound dogs a__" "as full of sh__ as a Christmas turkey" "hotter than a June bride in a feather bed" "harder than a whore's heart" "colder than a witches tit" "dumber (or crazier) than a sh__ house rat" "hanging around her like flies on sh__" "sh__ or get off the pot." "does a wild bear sh__ in the wood?" "busier than a cat covering sh__ on a tile floor" "hornier than a two p___ered billy goat" "stiffer than a wedding d__" "more nervous than a whore in church" "useless as t__s on a boar hog" "you think with you’re a__ instead of your head" "as sure as sh__ stinks" "colder than a well digger's a__" "colder'n a brass monkey's a__" "busy as a cat covering sh__ on a hot tin roof" "happier than a pig in sh__" "up s___ creek without a paddle" "a crock of sh__" "looks like a crow sh__ him on a fence post & the sun hatched him out" "acting like a b____ in heat" "tighter than a gnats a__ stretched over a rain-barrel" "don't have a pot to p___ in or a window to throw it out" "shaking like a dog sh____in' razor blades" "built like a brick sh__ house" "I'll be dipped in sh__ and rolled in bread crumbs" "Up and down like a whore on Saturday night."(something that fluctuates wildly like our current stock market.) "frog's a__ watertight?" "actin' like her t___ got caught in a wringer" "You look like you have been drug through a knot hole a__ backwards." "like a fart in a glove" "I am broke as flat as p___ on a plate"Eeyes are sh__-color brown." "pleased as p___ 'n vinegar." "her a__ is as big as the broad side of the barn." "10 pounds of sh__ in a 5 pound bag" "dumber than sh__" "thin as p___ on a plank" "can't find his a__ with both hands" "up to my a__ in alligators" "doesn't know his a__ from page 13." "so confused he doesn't know whether to scratch his watch or wind his a__" "couldn't find his a__ with both hands and a coon dog" "slicker than puppy sh__ on a wood floor" "as tired as a whore on nickel night" "busy as a bull's a__ in fly season" "on her like a pack of dogs on a three legged cat" "like sh__ through a goose" - meaning fast "He doesn't have enough sense to pour p___ out of a boot." "pleased as piss 'n vinegar." "he wouldn't know sh__ from Shinola" "he doesn't know his a___ from a hole in the ground!"

About the author: Lisa Jay is a freelance writer and the jewelry designer behind Lantana Designwear. You can visit her websites at http://www.LantanaDesignwear.com and www.JewelryMakingHQ.com Be sure to sign up for her newsletter at http://www.LantanaDesignwear.com/signup_newsletter to receive information on jewelry, fashion and womens issues.

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